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I was a delegate to the 2008 Northwest Washington synod assembly, at least up until it passed resolution H. Resolution H was titled "A Memorial on the Blessing of Same-Gender Couples' Promises of Lifelong Fidelity." It memorialized the synod council to engage, using all the appropriate protocols, the churchwide expression to move forward in the development of appropriate forms of service to bless same-sex unions. It outlined what such a form of service might entail, closely following the service for marriage.
I was tempted to propose an amendment to add "and other groupings" wherever the resolution contained the term "same-gender couple." My reasoning was as follows: There are people who in their self-understandings are bi-sexual. If they are able to develop committed and loving relationships, why must they be forced to choose between the male and female partner? Further, our capacities to love and commit are not all equal. After all, I have a committed and loving relationship with my spouse and my children and my grandchildren and my dad and my many siblings. The ability to form loving, committed bonds shouldn't be limited to couples only when there are so many who cannot find a partner and there are others with unused capacity. And I would add we find biblical support for this in Christ's boundless love and Abraham's family.
I did not propose the amendment because I did not want to further add to the mockery of God's Word that I experienced in the assembly. I read and hear "self-understanding" and "love" as primary concepts in the discussion of this issue. The argument seems to include: God loves everyone; God calls us to love as He loves; God created us in His image; God saw his creation and said it was good; and, therefore we should love and accept everyone just as they are in their self-understandings. I wonder, is there anyone left in this church whose self-understanding is sinner?
And so I now find myself at the end of what I thought was a lifelong, committed relationship; a relationship that began 59 years ago when my mother carried me to the baptismal font of Bethlehem Lutheran Church in Muskegon Heights, Mich. My partner, my church, has left me. It has been unfaithful. A lifetime of teaching and preaching, a commitment to keep the Word of God central in our relationship have changed. My partner, my church, has decided it needs to change. It has abandoned me for a new, more sexy, more politically correct, teaching. It wants someone who just demands a simple blessing. Maybe this was my fault. Maybe I was too needy. I, after all, was always asking for forgiveness.